I Believe, I Adore, I Trust and I Love You, January/February 2001
by AnnMarie Creedon
When I consecrated myself to the Immaculate Heart of Mary on
May 13, 2000, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I
grew up in a family with two loving parents, but with little
religious education, so I am determined to give my three children
a solid foundation in the Faith. To educate myself, I've read
everything I can get my hands on, including Bud MacFarlane Jr.'s
books. Impressed by Bud's faith-filled characters, I knew I needed
to love and serve Our Lord by living a life consecrated to Mary.
Immediately I experienced a spiritual upheaval: apathy, doubt, exhaustion during prayer. I realized it was the enemy launching a spiritual attack. I prayed through it and became stronger. Since my consecration, I have focused on deepening my prayer life and evangelizing through prayer and example. I have been blessed to find a saintly spiritual director who hears my confession about every two weeks and is helping me to see how I can better serve Our Lord with the talents I have. I now assist in teaching an eighth grade CCD class and will soon assist in leading a Catholic Kids Net team. I pray often now, reciting the Fatima Prayer throughout the day: "My God, I believe, I adore, I trust and I love You. I ask pardon for those who do not believe, do not adore, do not trust and do not love You." I feel strongly that, as an MI, it is my responsibility to pray for souls to go to heaven, to make sacrifices for those who have fallen away from their faith and for those who have no one to pray for them.
In June, my husband, Joe, my nine-year-old
son, Charlie, and I made a pilgrimage to Lourdes. Charlie has
autism and severe food allergies that contribute to his autism.
For years he has not been able to eat grains, dairy foods and
many other foods. This meant never eating in restaurants and
always having to plan ahead and bring food with us wherever we
went. On the feast of Corpus Christi, we had Charlie receive
Holy Communion at Lourdes. After this, we walked to town to have
lunch. Charlie, who is semi-verbal, insisted on having pizza.
He hadn't eaten pizza in years because of his allergies, but
we took a leap of faith and indulged him. He enjoyed that pizza
tremendously and has enjoyed all the forbidden foods-without
a reaction-ever since.
However, the greatest miracle of the trip was Charlie's new-found
love for Our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament. Over the summer we
went to daily Mass and he was an eager participant. Now that
school has started I can tell he misses going to Mass. Often,
he will say "I want church, brown circle." This is
Charlie's way of asking for the Eucharist. He now draws beautifully
detailed pictures of a priest on the altar saying Mass; of churches,
stained glass windows and people receiving communion.
Joe and I accepted a long time
ago that Charlie's autism may be God's will. We do pray for a
cure, and do everything within our power to help him to overcome
his disability. Yet it is more important for us to see Charlie
live a life of faith and to get to heaven, than it is for us
to see him be cured here on earth. After all, didn't Our Lady
of Lourdes say to St. Bernadette, "I can't promise you happiness
in this world, only in the next?" She says that to all of
us, especially those who are consecrated.
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